The traditional saying is that March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb. Whoever originally said this could not have had this week in mind.

While it’s not necessarily a bad week energywise, it’s caught like Homer Simpson on that wrecking ball (if you’ve seen the movie) between a rock and a bar called A Hard Place. It may be tough this week to know whether to stop or go, and you might find yourself dithering over a syllable when you could be wrapping up the entire manuscript.

This is the third week of Mercury Retrograde, and if it seems interminable, there are several reasons why. Mercury, the Messenger in Roman mythology, seems to have lost his cell phone somewhere, and it will be at least a few more days before he finds it and the coast is clear to make that important call. So hang on and plot how you want the conversation to go.

Yet while Mercury is making a difficult aspect to Saturn, the Lord of Focus and Hard Knocks (technically called a quincunx, or 150-degree “adaptation angle”), it also makes a lovely sextile, or 60-degree “opportunity angle,” to Venus, the Lady of Whatever You Want Whenever You Want It. The result is like you’re backing up and you hit the car behind you, but then out pops your BFF who invites you to have a beer and it’s not so bad after all.

That’s what this week is like. It’s a time to be personally intense, to sweat the details of that great role without thinking that the director is going to give you everything you want.

The Sun, King of Heaven for a reason, is feeling his oats now, being in just the second week of a new Spring Season; this emphasizes the physicality of the energy. It’s like meeting Ah-nuld back when he was a bodybuilder. Raw vitality is Aries’ signature and this week we’re very aware of it. Going to the gym is actually not such a bad idea. You could be creatively inspired in the middle of your backstroke or leg lift.

The Moon, ruler of How We Feel, is waxing, which means it’s still good for starting things, but please wait to sign legal documents. The Quarter Moon in Cancer on Friday makes a rather tense T-square aspect (an opposition bisected by another planet) in Cardinal Signs. The energy wants to zoom, but it’s like your motorcycle has moonshine in it, not premium gasoline. Caution is still recommended—unless you’re Steve McQueen.

Mars, the planet of Get-Up-And-Go (also retrograde), is beginning to slow down in early Virgo before turning direct April 14. It makes difficult aspects this week to both the Sun and Uranus, the Quick Change Artist Who Delights in Chaos. Our personal energy, in other words, may be subject to odd and sudden changes. Expect the unexpected: that Parking Enforcement vehicle may be right behind you. Allow extra time to get to that audition.

And sidestep, as best you can, the tough Sun square Pluto aspect on Thursday. Pluto, Lord of Power Plays, would just love to run over you like a truck. Don’t let someone who’s playing that role in your life break you down. Remember that Jupiter, the “Let’s All Be Optimistic” planet, is now accelerating in mid-Taurus and making many dreams manifest abundantly. Neptune, the Dreamer Par Excellence, is quietly observing how much you really want it before it gives you its ethereal blessing. Your magnificent watercolor painting may have waited for this moment to manifest.

One last note: the Sun now makes an easeful trine, or fortunate 120-degree angle, to the transiting North Node, or revolving Life Destiny Point. This week, you may find your individual destiny and your larger, cosmic purpose may be ‘N Sync. Hey, whatever happened to them, anyway?

Twelve sign forecast:

ARIES (March 20-April 19): Be sure of what you want because this week it’s like the Universe slips a thousand-dollar bill in your pocket, but it’s coated with slippery oil that may make you drop it. Stick to your goal and don’t take offense if someone slaps you upside the head. You didn’t plan it, but it just may cure your toothache.

TAURUS (April 20-May 19): Aren’t you getting tired of all the ice cream being specially delivered to you? No? Good, because if you keep your wits about you this week, they begin to deliver monogrammed cartons, too. The only problem is stuffing yourself so full of—well, YOU—that you forget to be grateful. It’s a good time to write the Deliverer a thank-you note.

GEMINI (May 20-June 19): Never let it be said that you do not appreciate a mental challenge. This week, you could really be mental! Realize that the pressure is coming from inside you, like the Alien trying to gnaw through your stomach. Dissolve it with an antacid before it starts devouring you. Your imagination is working double shifts now, so create something meaningful instead of being like HAL 9000 who said, “I can’t do that, Dave.”

CANCER (June 20-July 19): The edgy Quarter Moon in your sign lends a tough-edged, combative cast to your week, like Ali and Frazier in the “Thrilla In Manila.” Practice patience and a little of Ali’s rope-a-dope strategy that he used on George Foreman. Let the tense people in your life—including you—wear themselves out. After that, exhibit your real strength. You’ll still be standing at the bell.

LEO (July 20-August 19): You’re used to shining your own crown, but this week the polish may be a little thin. Go easy on how you promote yourself now because, as the Brylcream ad used to say, “A little dab’ll do ya.” You don’t ALWAYS have to be onstage, you know. Although—wait—Sun’s in a Fire Sign: that IS your cue. But underplay now. You’ll get more awards that way.

VIRGO (August 20-September 19): This week it’s time for you to tackle Rubik’s Cube. Your life has been a puzzle for some time, and it often seems to you as though you’ll never come up with the right answer. But that’s an illusion. Rubik knew what he was doing, and so can you. Take the time to figure it out through deep concentration. Calm breathing and gnarly details are your friends now.

LIBRA (September 20-October 19): Your partners in crime now are either gangstas or saints. There’s no helping some of the negative fools in your life and the others, thank you very much, don’t need your help. Finding your way between the hot messes and the cool customers denotes your prime challenge this week. It’s said that if a pickpocket goes to see a saint, the thief will see only his pockets. Keep your own vision positive.

SCORPIO (October 20-November 19): It’s not so much that you hate life, it’s that you hate being taken advantage of. This week, life may give you some victim-ready situations. A little advice: RESIST! That cape hanging in your closet makes you a superhero, and it’s not there for nothing. This is the time to bring it out. The whole world is watching, or at least, is mildly interested. Do your best to entertain it with your moxie.

SAGITTARIUS (November 20-December 19): Why is your gallop slowing down to a trot? It’s not just the hill you’re trying to climb. Replenishment of your own energy is the theme this week, and while you may see in your mind how easily you can conquer the mountain, it still requires one hoof in front of the other. The lighter your load, the easier you stride, so don’t pick up any riders this week. It’s all about being in a graceful flow.

CAPRICORN (December 20-January 19): The great thing about this week for you is how serious you get about your own happiness. It’s said a smile is just a frown turned upside down, but the opposite is also true. Now is the time you recognize what keeps you from achievement and help it to pack its luggage. Take all the stuff out to the porch, push it away, lock your mental door and don’t answer any dubious doorbell rings this week.

AQUARIUS (January 20-February 19): Sometimes it’s enough to just get the dish halfway cooked because you can experiment with the rest if it tastes good so far. This is one of those weeks where you need to get the basics down so you can play with whatever is left on the spice shelf. But you’ll spoil it if you think it’s beneath you to spend so much effort on something you think you already know. That’s why they’re called basics: they create a base for your grander creations.

PISCES (February 20-March 19): If life followed your cue, it would be sunshine, lollipops and Leslie Gore songs everywhere. But now it seems that hardbitten, grownup Rap has taken over in your life. This week you get to reclaim your innocence if you sing with a childlike conviction. You just have to avoid people who disparage sweetness and light and say it’s unreal —and that includes you. Believe in joy and write about rainbows now even if it seems to be pouring.

Next week: It’s Easter time, and Mercury turns direct. Can you say Hallelujah?!?